Nothing marked the decadence of Byzantium so much as the absurd rituals of its Court. Conceived in the days when the Roman Empire still stretched from Scotland to Syria, they were maintained and elaborated when there was nothing left but Constantinople itself, and a tiny corner of Greece. The Treasury was empty. the provinces gone, the army tiny But the Emperor and his courtiers kept awarding themselves ever more elaborate titles and honours, as if they were still a mighty superpower.
For Byzantium, read Britain. Today its ruling class has handed out yet another series of honours with archaic titles like Member of the British Empire. [1]In reality the British Empire comprises little more than England and a few highly questionable offshore islands. Whether the British Empire was a Good Thing or a Bad Thing in the past we leave to others to discuss. But there is little question that its archaic legacy of class and culture is a bad thing now, holding these islands back from real progress in things like education and science.
But look at the people who get the gongs, and they are some of the best in society. People who’ve done that little extra in all sorts of fields-sports, business, charity, science or just good old slogging work to hold their communities together. Yes, they do deserve some extra recognition. It would be churlish to throw away this social gold just because of a bit of historical revisionism. Instead we propose a National Service Award, divided into three classes of merit, for outstanding civic service in the areas we have mapped above(military matters are entirely outside our remit). That way holders of older awards like OBEs and MBEs could be “copied across”, much like the modern NVQ system allows all academic awards to fit into a common framework.
Everyone now agrees the the poor old UK is in a fix. The only way out of any fix is to look to the future. Might this be one tiny step towards it?
[1]https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-64125449
#new years honours #byzantine empire #uk decline #national service award
“God is a Republican” was a common enough bumper sticker a few years back. For all we know, you can still see few in what might be termed, politely, the more rural areas of certain states. Whether this belief is true or not, it leaves its holders with a certain problem. If God is behind it all, He is certainly behind the weather. And that has been getting a lot, lot worse lately. Everywhere.
We’ve got two writers for you in our links. John Vidal in the Guardian[1],but also Eric Mack from the impeccably right-wing, free market Conservative Forbes.[2] And the point they make is the same: the storms, the cyclones, the fires and the crop failures are exactly in line with what the IPCC and other climate scientists have been telling us for a long time. Storm Elliot and things like it are becoming bigger, more frequent and more extreme. So where do all these Republicans fit in?
Well, one thing is certain. If something had been done about it four and five decades ago, we wouldn’t be in this mess now. Don’t say we didn’t know. President Jimmy Carter was aware of the danger, and installed solar panels on the White House roof. But Ronald Reagan took them down. Thus setting the tone for his party and its media cheer leaders who have acted like an enormous elephant standing in the way of all efforts to deal with climate change ever since. And it’s not us at LSS saying this. This blog has only come about because of a slew of articles we found in the course of something else.[3] [4][5] All we’ve done to select a few, and those from over several years, to show how long this has been going on. And perhaps a hint or two of why.
Cause and effect is a dodgy art, and direct attributions are difficult. But anyone can ask questions. So here’s one for our American Readers. When the storm sweeps in, or the crops dry in the fields: how much are the Republicans responsible for this? We only asked.
All too often the pages of our popular press are filled with lurid headlines like ” BOGNOR BUS STOP BLITZED BY VANDALS” (Bognor Regis Clarion October 2022) “FELPHAM FLOWERBED DEVASTATED BY VANDAL GANGS” (ibid. May 2021) Hard reading. A sign of the decadent age in which we live, no doubt. But how can you be sure it was Vandals that did it? There were many tribes who invaded the Roman Empire. Visigoths, Ostrogoths, Gepids, Burgundians, Saxons, Jutes, Franks, Alemanni, Heruli, Sarmatians, Huns, to name but a few. (actually that’s quite a lot-ed) None of them were beyond a little rapine, pillage, devastation and other forms of historical activity. And yet every time a bit of grafitti is put on a wall, or a window is kicked in on a bus stop, everyone blames the Vandals. Are we just being a little guilty of, well, to use a strong word-discrimination?
Take the Visigoths. When they sacked Rome in 410 AD, do you imagine that was totally damage-free? Can you imagine a group of Visigoths saying “careful with that statue you’re pillaging, Wulf, we don’t want to break it!” Yet no one ever writes a headline like VISIGOTHS BREAK CAR PARK GATES IN NEW MALDEN” Or how about BURGUNDIANS DESTROY BIRD FOUNTAIN IN DROITWICH” No, it wouldn’t happen. Instead everyone blames the poor old Vandals, with no evidence whatsoever. And that’s an injustice, if ever we saw one.
Now we are are not saying Vandals have a totally spotless record. When they swept through Gaul, Hispania and into Africa in the fifth century AD, the whole process was not entirely without its destructive side. And certainly items got a bit knocked-over a tad when they sacked Rome in 455. But we believe that after they settled in what is now Tunisia they must have got a bit more careful, or things like the buses wouldn’t run. In fact to check this out, we sent a team of LSS reporters to that country to interview some real Vandals and find out what they thought. To be honest, it wasn’t a total success. Your average Vandal tended to the tall and beardy, with blonde hair and blue eyes. And they spoke German. We couldn’t find anyone like that at all, apart from certain tourist areas. And he said he was from Stockholm and worked in home sauna installation.
So the conclusion is obvious. To blame Vandals for every bit of damage is just plain prejudiced, discriminatory, and wrong. Next time you read a headline blaming Vandals , write to the editor of that journal and point out it could have been Ostrogoths or Heruli. Or even Huns. Don’t let Vandals off if they’re guilty. But treat them according to the same rules as everyone else.
Well, Christmas is almost upon us, and LSS will be closing down for a few days. But whether you believe in the Theological justification for this festival or not, it is always an occasion for fun. And for us here at LSS that means the chance for a drop or two of the stuff that cheers. So, especially for the benefit of our foreign readers, we thought we’d show case how Christmas in England is celebrated, from the convivialist’s point of view, over the key days of the period.
Christmas Eve We usually like to close the office at around 12.30, and a crowd of us head over to the Porters Arms at East Croydon Station, apart from a few po-faced individuals who head off to their families and suchlike. Generally it’s beer all the way, with good old traditional brands like Fosters, Kronenburg and Fullers, though some of the ladies often go for a little white wine. such as a nice Chardonnay or Sauvignon Blanc. Of course people from that big insurance company next door have to spoil things by making it difficult to get to the bar, but we just ignore them as far as possible. It is Christmas and all that.
The next part of the day usually involves a little rest, which can often be taken on the train, provided you don’t miss your stop! A taxi from Littlehampton back to London can be quite expensive if you find you have arrived there and all the train drivers have gone home. But let bygones be bygones as wives often say, and what’s in the past stays in the past.
It’s probably best to avoid the pub again. We recommend staying at home with a couple of shorts. Gin and Tonic is a good stand-by, or whisky and spoarkling mineral water with lots of ice. Get a good night’s sleep. Tomorrow will be a long one.
Christmas Day There are two perils here: 1) the arrival of endless unwanted relatives and neighbours with the consequent strictly enforced jollity, and 2) the need to pull rabbits out of hats during complicated cooking duties. We suggest cutting that first coffee of the day with a good good slugger of brandy, after which you’re ready for the ordeal that is to come. Have a secret stash of something in the kitchen as well, even if its just a can of beer, tucked behind the ham in the fridge
As for those pesky visitors: Present them as early as possible with a big cheerful cocktail: we recommend Bellini or Harvey Wallbangers, as they’re brightly coloured, easy to make in bulk, most people like them and they go well with the kind of cheap noisome little nibbles the proletariat seem to favour. You can always slip a glass of your best port or burgundy to your mates, and find out what is happening in the world of football. Always have lots of cold beer handy as well, as a well placed can can terminate many a tedious conversation before it has started.
Now to dinner: Traditionally, the rich bathed their Christmas Turkeys in Champagne, and the poor in Asti Spumante, a kind of distant ancestor of Prosecco, in the way that VHS was to DVDs. Cremont can offer a lovely middle way here. Though, as we move away from Turkey towards Beef, why not change to something classy and still, like a really good Chablis? Or, if you prefer a red, try a bottle or two of Primitivo, Sicily’s finest.
Always volunteer to do the Christmas pudding as you can swig from the brandy used to set it on fire when no one’s looking This trope melds seamlessly into after dinner liqueurs, when basically anything goes. Sherry, Baileys, Madeira, Port were all traditional ways of surviving present-giving, the Queen’s speech (RIP) and Top of the Pops (RIP also)
We doubt you feel like anything much now, so we’ll pass to:
Boxing Day Often dawns surprisingly bright and sparkling, though some may be up a little late. A good shower, shave and sandwich may give you enough strength for a walk to the local pub. Light beers and lagers are to be preferred. And cold white wines will do wonders to wash down all those cold meats , cold potatoes, cold sausages, cold stuffing, cold parsnips, cold cheeses, cold christmas puddings and all those other cold leftovers which somehow have to be eaten, before we start those new year diets which would be entirely unnecessary if we hadn’t pigged out like a bunch of Roman Emperors for three long days
There’s several entities vying to become the richest and most powerful in the world. The USA is still in there, but China, the EU and India will be straining to make the cut. And there are subsidiary nations, like Switzerland or Canada who like the riches without the power, mainly due to their close trading links with neighbouring blocs. But who might end up the poorest? Whose leaders display such blind obduracy, and whose subjects are so ignorant and backward that their country sinks down to the bottom of the world league-and stays there?
Based on the evidence from this BBC story by Aalia Farzan and Frances Mao, we at LSS think that Afghanistan has to be a strong candidate for the wooden spoon. [1] Because the geniuses who run that country have now decided to ban university education for women. This is in addition to their attacks on secondary education for females, the enforcement of a strict dress code, and all the other spiteful petty indignities they have visited on their own wives, mothers and sisters. Even the most cursory glance at some economic websites will reveal the catastrophic effect this will have on that benighted country’s GDP [2] We are sure that the elite band of scholars who make up the readership of LSS will be able to find much more for themselves.
Apologists for these fools will always plead “ah, but there are special circumstances-the culture , the religion, the consequences of History…..”
To which we shall only respond with the tale of an ordinary Roman who, confronted by a particularly crass Emperor’s decision to execute the State’s best General, told the Prince:
“I am ignorant, Sir, of your motives and reasons. I only know that you have acted like a man who cuts off his right hand with his left”
Perhaps some other countries will heed the example of Afghanistan, and learn in time
Of all the genres in all the movie theatres in all the world, we had to walk into this one……….Nothing is so recognizable as the Western. You don’t need a Doctorate in Cultural Theory to recognise its semiotic signifiers- smokin’ guns, stetsons, sheriffs, stallions and all the others locked in the collective subconscious of moviegoers around the world. It’s America’s very special cultural trope. No one ever imagines we are talking about the West of England, or China, or Ruislip for that matter. No one makes Easterns, or Northerns or Southerns for one good reason. The idiom of the Western is so well- established that every Director can impose their own vision and purpose, each as different from the next as The Outlaw Josey Wales is to Blazing Saddles. Some are mere entertainment. Others muse over the profoundest questions of love, and death and honour. But will be a Western playing on a channel somewhere on your TV, in your collection, or in your memory, now, as you read this.
Our list today is from The Independent[1] but its canon is neither exhaustive nor exclusive. You’ll have your own opinions. Yet it does showcase some of the finest directors, actors and films ever, so you won’t be disappointed if you choose from it. Above all the Western is a democratic genre. It’s heroes are always the ordinary man or woman, which makes it American indeed. Everyone can identify with Henry Fonda at Oxbow, or little Joey at the end of Shane. You don’t have to be a King, a Press Tycoon or head of an Italian-American business conglomerate to get inside their heads. We thought ELO recognised this rather well in their own tribute, Wild West Hero Thus ending a midweek blog with one of musical links for a change. Well, it is almost Christmas.
It’s fair to say that we at LSS are quick to note when someone else does what we are trying to do, only they do it much better. Well, gentle readers, such is the case with the Guardian who have pulled together the top ten science stories of the year. We really want you to click on the links below, goodness knows. But before you do, note how some of our old favourites like AI, antibiotics and astronautics are in there. As well as research transfer, shown here in the cases of COVID vaccines and Brillouin microscopy. Grant us that at at least.
Oh, and grant us one tiny second more to explain why we have done this. Because while the foolish mass of mankind squander their lives in foolish quarrels over lines on maps, or the frivolous doings of vainglorious celebrities, real progress is made by people who quietly think and learn and think again. If only there were more of them.
It is sad to recall that only last Saturday we hailed the end of the wild days of Hollywood star P 22, and looked forward to his long and peaceful retirement in a wildlife sanctuary. Now we know the truth; the reasons for gating the poor old Puma were so grave that a happy life could not be possible. His injuries were just too severe. He had to be euthanised, or put to sleep humanely, as we say in these islands.
But animal lovers everywhere will remember the bond he created with so many admirers, and how much it helped the cause of conservation. One day, when we have won, and the world is safe to live in again, let’s remember the little bond that formed between progressive minded people and this remarkable animal.
P-22 retires The adventures of Puma P-22 have intrigued the inhabitants of Los Angeles as much as those of any movie star for the last 10 years. But like many an old trouper, he’s now too long in the tooth for his starring role in Griffith Park, and is to be retired to a sanctuary, to spend his days in nostalgic memory of when he topped the bill in LA
Hope in India India is fast becoming so important that everything they do there counts, right around the world. That’s why it’s so hopeful to read of a major rewilding initiative, which might also help to mitigate global warming. Nature explains, The Promise and Politics of Rewilding India, via The New Yorker
In midlife, writer and filmmaker Pradip Krishen fell in love with trees. Now he is a leading advocate for rewilding in India, as one of the leaders of a group called the Ecological Restoration Alliance of India. Rather than quick-fix tree-planting projects — some of which are nothing more than a media stunts and have little long-term success — their restoration aims focus on the specifics of local ecosystems and the livelihoods of their people. But that approach is at odds with the policies of Prime Minister Narendra Modi, which push for rapid development that sometimes sweeps aside scientists’ warnings and Indigenous people’s resistance.The New Yorker | 30 min read
Work this one out Humans have always had a fascination with puzzles. Is it in our DNA? Some of them are very old. And some are timeless as these two pieces form the Mail make clear:
Putin’s Puzzle Talking of which-why didn’t Vladimir Putin actually sit down and think for ten minutes before he launched his foolish invasion of Ukraine? The Guardian outlines the long term harm he has done to Russia, its people and its culture. And it’s catastrophic.
Daydream believer Everyone dreams about what might happen if they won the lottery. But for some daydreams and fantasies can become as addictive as cocaine, alcohol or cigarettes. The Conversation offers this wake up call:
California Dreaming This week’s song started where we ended, with P-22 dreaming of his lost freedoms, while lapping up the cream of the Golden State’s largesse from his well -appointed paddock. It’s the Mommas and the Poppas-who else?
We’ve always been Roman buffs at LSS. But the purpose of studying History is to draw lessons from it that might help today. And Sam Webb of the Independent has uncovered a story that does exactly that. Everyone agrees that the mass invasions by Attila and his Hun followers were the final nail in the coffin for the Western Empire. But what caused them? The answer seems to be sudden climate change on the steppes, turning herdsmen into predatory raiders, desperate to feed their families. [1] [2]
Before you yawn and say “all a very long time ago” look at these stats. According to the UNHCR, on average 21.5 million people a year have been displaced by climate change since 2008. By 2050 1.2 billion people will be displaced. At which point our old friend Dave Watford from the Dog and Duck pops up to shout “we’ll yuze the army ter keep ’em AHT!” Sorry, Dave. That’s what the Romans tried all through the fourth century. In the end, they’ll just come and take it. That’s why Attila’s name is a byword to this day.
Learning, Science and Society 