Friday Night Is cocktail night-questions and answers

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Today w open our portals to you , the readers, in the hope we can allay your anxieties about this important aspect of all our lives. Your anonymity is guaranteed!

What is the correct dress for a Gentleman to wear to cocktail night? Mr AF, Bridport, Dorset Dear Mr AF: the rules on this have always been very prescriptive, but fair. In winter, a dark blue or black jacket, striped shirt, creased chinos and smart black shoes. Tie; anything regimental. old school, or your golf club. The building, not the thing you hit the ball with! In summer you may sport a light jacket, summer being defined as any date from Easter Sunday until the final Bank Holiday in August. You may of course wear a Panama. But don’t wear it indoors, or you will look like a numpty.

Does my favourite brew, Old Rogered Dog, count as a cocktail? After all, it’s got alcohol in it, and a mix of organic chemicals of dubious provenance, just like a cocktail? Dave Geezer, Watford

No

Can the enormous volume of sound systems, for example in a strip club, cause the ice in my cocktail to melt prematurely, thereby marring the pleasure of my evening? Mr NS, Sutton Coldfield

Dear Mr NS, we would hate to have the pleasure of your evening marred in any way! After consultation with leading physicists. we can report: sound is energy, and could in theory increase the rate of melting of your ice cubes. Nevertheless, other factors, such as ambient temperature, will prove more significant, so concentrate on mitigating that.

Why should a Martini be stirred, and not shaken? JB, Vauxhall

Because that’s what it says in the book, you div! Honestly, what do they teach you people at MI6 these days?

Were cocktails invented in Pirate Days? Mr SS, Reading

Dear Mr SS-The general consensus is, yes, they were. As the pirates sailed around the Caribbean, they found an abundance of fruit, and both white and dark rum. Hence most experts agree that most early cocktails were rum- based such as early versions of Between the Sheets or Pink Rum. Ice could be easily obtained by sending those who worked below decks up into the mountains-the exercise did them good. Then, as now, cocktails were for the better sort-the ship’s officers. The men were quite happy with grog and beer, and pulling weevils from each others’ beards.

What music shall I play with my cocktails? DT, Washington, USA

Anything jazzy and piano-ey. Oscar Petersen is a good jumping off point; try to imagine the atmosphere of a Manhattan hotel, full of secret agents, detectives and femmes fatales, where eyes meet over cold glasses and the promise of indiscretion hangs ever in the air. A bit hard to drum up if you live in Sutton Coldfield like Mr NS, but, as we head off to our own wardrobe to dress, we like to think you will try.

#cocktails #pirates #oscarpetersen